However, in any marriage relationship one person has to be the final decision maker. That, according to scripture, should be the husband. If, of course, the husband’s decision is diametrically opposed to scripture, or to shastra, then the wife is not bound to follow it. However, a sincere wife will recognize: even though she maybe wants to do something slightly different than her husband, if her husband is a devotee of Krishna and his decisions are not against shastra, she should be submissive and go along with her husband’s final decision.
That does not mean that she should not have her own view of things. She should also have her view. However, when there’s one thing to be done and two people have to do it together, and these two people have different ideas on the way it should be done, then obviously one of them has to surrender. The husband should listen very carefully to the wife’s point of view.
He doesn’t just reject her, “Oh, you’re the wife, shut up, sit down. What do you know? You’re just a low born woman.” This happens. If you’ve got this philosophy, you have to have that reaction to her point of view. So, the husband should listen very carefully to the wife’s point of view.
After all, her point of view may be better than his, or it may be a very good idea, and he should be willing to recognize that and accept that, and do what she’s putting forward if it is better.” That means he has to accept: she knows something. They consider, they discuss, they can decide which is better. But, like I said, if it comes to a point where two people can have two perfectly acceptable ways of doing a certain thing, but obviously that thing cannot be done in both ways, then it should be done in the way that the husband is putting forward. That is the role of the wife, and that is to be submissive in this regard. So, if it comes down to the final issue, then yes, of course, the husband, according to shastras, has the final decision.